I was recently having the age old fashion conversation about whether it is okay to wear white after Labor Day. The short answer is no. And the long answer is…no.
You can choose to disagree with me and I won’t judge – but you would be wrong.
There is plenty of speculation about how and where this unwritten rule originated. I, however, am convinced it was created with the intention of giving us boundaries as a society and to help us from falling victim to the same fate as many civilizations before us.
The very survival of our culture depends on people putting away their white clothing and shoes after the first weekend in September. If you want to question my logic then just look at some of the cultures that have come, and gone, before us. The Roman Empire fell once everyone started wearing white togas after Labor Day. And what about the collapse of the Ming Dynasty? Contrary to the popular myth that it was inter-tribal feuding, it was actually their refusal to put away their white sandals and move to transitional fall colors in their footwear. (You history majors can back me up on this, right?)
It’s so simple and easy – just don’t wear white after Labor Day. Many people use the excuse that summer temperatures still exist after Labor Day so they feel comfortable still wearing summer clothing. I’m not saying you have to break out the winter wardrobe. Certainly common sense must prevail, but for the love of all that is holy, don’t try to dress like it is still the middle of July. Just ask the Mayans. Oh, wait you can’t. Their civilization collapsed when it became common practice to wear white after the “official end of summer.”
Contrary to what Vogue or Cosmopolitan magazines may say, you are not a fashion forward trend setter for wearing white in the “no white after Labor Day zone.” You are, instead, guilty of hurling our culture toward certain disaster and ultimately destruction.
Don’t let anyone tell you that this rule is old fashioned or out of date. Don’t fall into the trap of believing that one little lapse of wearing white capris won’t matter. It will; because it’s just a short and slippery ride down the slope to linen and sear sucker, my friend. And then we are doomed for sure.
(In case you’re confused, my tongue was firmly planted in my cheek while writing this. However, I was NOT wearing white!)